Having a picky eater can be one of the most challenging and frustrating parenting experiences. No one likes to spend time and energy making a meal only to be told “yuck, I don’t want that”. Equally as frustrating is learning that at kindy, your child eats spaghetti meatballs with carrots and celery but at home they will only eat chicken nuggets! Outlined below are the top three tips for managing mealtimes without the tantrums.
Have a Routine
Having a mealtime routine is a helpful way to prepare kids for the task of eating. Eating is one of the most sensory demanding activities we do each day and for kids that struggle with smells and textures, it is especially challenging. Often, kids are expected to sit at the table on an adult chair, which is like expecting an adult to enjoy sitting on a bar stool while cutting into a steak. It is uncomfortable for their body’s and makes them wriggly and agitated. Having a mealtime routine helps their bodies prepare for the task of eating so that they feel more comfortable at the table. My favourite mealtime routines include having the child help set the table. This may seem simple, but it involves important sensory preparation that helps signal the body to prepare for food. Have your child help to wipe down the table, carry plates to the table and set out the cutlery. These activities provide tactile and deep pressure input which helps to calm us and prepare us for the upcoming sensations. For kids that struggle with different sensory properties of food, a wet cloth is a great exposure activity to desensitise them before their meal. If your child has extreme sensory defensiveness or sensory seeking, speak to your Occupational Therapist about a tailored sensory diet.
Eat As a Family
This is a hard one for many busy families but bear with us because there are some important benefits to consider. Eating as a family introduces kids to food that they typically would refuse. When it comes to kids adding variety to their diet and being comfortable introducing new foods, there is so much more to focus on other than them taking the first bite. Kids need to be comfortable with the sight, smell, sound and feeling of foods before they are even willing to taste it. If new foods are never presented in front of the child, they will never get to experience those important steps. If your child only eats chicken nuggets and you want to cook lasagne for dinner that’s ok! Cook your lasagne and chicken nuggets but present everything on the table and serve everyone a little bit of everything. If the child doesn’t tolerate the food on their plate, they are welcome to scoop it off onto a different plate next to them. That way, they are still looking at, smelling, interacting and possibly even touching new foods. Kids learn a lot by watching others, so watching you eat new foods will show them how to do it and overtime they will feel more comfortable with foods as they are presented repeatedly without the pressure of having to take a bite. You don’t have to eat as a family every night, that isn’t always possible with busy families. Just consider that every time a new food is presented, they are one step closer to eating new foods.
Consider Their Seating
We touched on this above but considering a child’s seating will have a big impact on their ability to stay at the table and try new foods. I know that when I go out to eat, I will always avoid sitting on a bar stool. I always feel like my posture is off, I’m slouching, and I don’t like my feet dangling. It’s the same for children. Adult dining chairs don’t provide kids with the correct posture, stability and comfort to promote eating. Ideally, we want our feet to be flat on the ground, our knees to be bent at 90 degrees and our backs to be supported. Otherwise, we constrict our airways, crush our organs and don’t feel safe and stable to be eating. My favourite chair for kids is a Tripp Trapp chair which can be adjusted as the child grows and provides postural support and a comfortable footrest. These chairs are an investment so if you’re looking for a chair that will last your child a long time, these are great.
Conclusion
Having a child with picky eating can be extremely challenging. Please know that you are not alone and as long as your child is eating SOMETHING, you are doing an amazing job. If you would like further clarification or tailored help, please feel free to reach out to us and explore some more evidence-based ways to target picky eating.
Melanie Williamson
Occupational Therapist
SOS Feeding Therapist.